the joke whore

its almost eight o'clock. i stated work at five. and this is pretty much the first break that i have had all night. and by break, i mean time wherein i am paid to do the things that i would do for free. i started out pretty early this morning, so i have to admit i am tired. i was back in TO by one, starting out in oshawa, and that was all good because i have time to relax in the afternoon (and digest my sausage mcmuffins).

a weird thing happened to me outside of the go train. people were annoyed that the train doors were not open when the bus dropped us little bugs off and were standing around, doing the typical its-cold-out-here-poor-me mumble. when, a rather large older man, with a drop of snot hanging from his nose (i choose to believe it was cold weather induced snot, not the from a real cough-sneeze-sneez kind of cold), started cracking, in a very articulate professional manner, jokes. seriously. a whole show. complete with mother-in-law fat jokes, wife jokes, all kinda of one liners. i looked around for hidden cameras, wondering if this was really happening. i told him that i had heard them all before and tried to bury my nose in my book. (why wasn't my ipod on, i will never know). the other people in the shelter could feel sorry for my position i could tell.

when the doors did open, he handed me a booklet of paper. on it was ordering information to the tune of: "if you liked what you heard today, order book 1 or book 2 for 12.95..." what the fuck? if you are out there, reverend of door-to-door comedy salesman, i am giving you a very serious shake of the head. i felt used! here i was being all sympathetic (to what i thought was a crazy old guy) like the sucker that i am! and really, here was a real joker, an up-to-no-good comic whore, prostituting himself with jokes, giving out his first hit for free, and seeing who would buy! i threw out the sheet though now i almost wished i had kept it.

all in all, it was a pretty relaxing day. spent the afternoon reading at starbucks (as per usual) wherein i encountered several delightful examples of "didn't their mother teach them any better," a new fashion crimes game that i play mostly in my own head. first up, the girl in the purple scarf and headband who was wearing a waffle-style long underwear shirt. okay, i appreciate the cute little flowers. i myself saw that shirt at american eagle and contemplated buying it. but. when wearing items of clothing that are traditionally used as under garments, you have to take especial care to ensure it doesn't look like you are wearing your underwear outside of your clothes. she did. i think i could see her bra. (shame!) the prize winner of the day however was a girl, my age, who was wearing over the knee light brown leather boats. with navy tights. and a black ugly zeller's jacket. with...a summer skirt! the horror! it was linen. and stuck to her tights. and it made me want to shake her. sometimes i wonder why i even care about what other people are wearing. and then i remember. i'm shallow. so if you catch me at moment where i am perhaps waxing philosophical, don't forget i am such a petty person underneath. a friend tried to engage me (and some others) in a very intelligent discussion about the downfall of jesscia simpson and the way the media has portrayed that fall from grace. and i realized, unless i am talking about celebrities within the context of their clothes, their sex life, or their drug use, i do not care to discuss them at all. like i said, shallow.

promise of the day: i am going to learn how to knit. a friend of tasha's is making this absolutly crazy striped blanket. i am going to copy her. bright colours, no rhyme or reason, ordered chaos here i come. it'll be like my striped rug, only for my bed. i think that jarrod is going to love it. and by love, i mean, might burn it while i am sleeping.

confession of the day: i definitly rammed one girl on the way to school. she was walking in a group and just wasn't moving. well, neither was i bitch!

oh, if you are bored, check out Snap Shirts. apparently it randomly selects words and creates a cloud of them. you can, if you'd like, swap words in and out.